Servo - March 2016

of not being chosen for the show. The fear of your robot being totally destroyed.

Like a tsunami of dread, the emotions long since forgotten wash over me and I suddenly feel like I am on a roller coaster, unable to get off; yet unsure if I want to ride, unsure if I can ride.

I must address my fears. You can come along on this journey if you like, as this article is more than a piece in a magazine. This is my real dilemma: My racing mind trying to decide what to do; if I should do anything, in fact. I am torn between letting it go, of growing up, and focusing on being a good dad, and of the overwhelming urge to grab the keys to the shed and start digging out my tools.

It is happening as I write this. I am arguing with myself and I think I should write it down — however chaotic — before the tornado in my brain disappears. Let's start at the beginning.

Can I realistically get a working robot into the studio for the first day of filming? BattleBots is easy to answer: No, I cannot. I am in the UK and there is not enough time for me to build and ship a machine to the USA. That was easy, but disappointing. Robot Wars, however, is possible. So, let's investigate the options.

Can I build a brand new robot on my own in six weeks? No, don't be silly. Okay, so where do I start ...

Do I have any robots already built? Yes. I have four heavyweights in fact, none of which I will name in this article for fear of breaching confidentiality agreements yet to be signed, but they have not been in an arena in real competition for almost a decade and have all appeared on TV before.

I will rule one robot out instantly, as he is too dear to me to risk in the arena with modern robots. There really is a chance of losing him to much more powerful machines, and he is unlikely to be competitive.

I have visited my robots to see how they have dealt with the years, put away and wrapped up in plastic. It is not the best news. There is rust, and damp (oh no!). The sudden decision to stop robot combat many years ago left me with no motivation to repair my battle damaged machines from the last events, so this will need immediate remedy, and is not so easy to do now that many of my suppliers no longer exist. I no longer have the tools I once had, or the time and disposable income. This is not looking good so far.

I needed guidance at this point, so I phoned the show to ask what kind of robot they are looking for and what would give my application to be on the show the best chance of success. I should not have done that. By name-dropping the robots I have (who have all been on TV before as noted), one was a clear preference to the excited representative. I must now consider my dear favorite robot again. Oops.

Can I get any of my robots ready in time? Robot 1 (we’ll call him Crusher) is an empty shell. Most of the parts are broken, damaged, or were used in other machines. I do not have the time, money, or workshop facilities to rebuild this machine. Crusher is out before we start.

Robot 2 (who we can call Lifter) is working fully; in fact, he ran last month in a demonstration at a local school. Lifter is old, however — very old — and will not remain square with a modern robot bumping into it. As cannon fodder, it may be worth an application. However, this robot is well known and it is unfair to sacrifice it in such a way. My options are disappearing quickly.

Robot 3 (my Axebot) is almost ready to run as I type this. I only need to pump up the tires, charge the batteries, and fill the CO2 gas tank. Unfortunately, the rules have changed since this robot last fought.

The pneumatic system needs a full overhaul and certification testing in order to comply with the latest safety rules (but that gives me a reason to upgrade it and increase the power). The batteries are most likely dead, but certainly past their best, having first been used in 2001.